After Friday's events, Saturday greeted me with fun times, giggles and achievements! I truly felt at the gym yesterday I was starting to make some headway. This could have been down to Friday's events, but it has given me the nudge to remind myself I can push that little bit harder.
I also went to Rebel Bingo.
This is not the first time I have been to this event, but it was previously know as Underground Rebel Bingo. It was a secret event, but now it is loud, and proud and refuses to be 'undercover'! This isn't the usual type of bingo, and it is not one that your Gran might go to. No sir this is very different!
Rebel Bingo describes itself like this....One night we got drunk in the basement of a church hall in London. We found an old bingo kit stored down there. We started messing around with it and accidentally invented a new, mutant form of bingo. We knew it was wrong, but it felt good. We weren't supposed to be there, in the basement, and we definitely weren't supposed to be experimenting with bingo. We called it Rebel Bingo.
The old skool bingo community have heard about our Rebel Bingo parties - about the noise - the screams - the emotion - they are not happy. They think we are desecrating their boring old game. They are old and angry. They want us to stop. But we don't care.
This is not bingo. It's Rebel Bingo. We know it's wrong. But it feels so right. And they can't stop us.
Their rules are as follows....
No old people.
No boring people.
No wankers.
No office parties.
No hen parties.
No stag parties.
No work suits.
No customer service.
The night starts with rebellious anthems such as 'Killing In The Name Of' (now on my gym play list!) whilst a clock runs down to the start of the mayhem!
Once the clock has run down to 00:00 the presenter of the nights precedings comes out with his two bingo caller assistants. Picture scantily clad bingo callers, with hilarious and disgusting bingo calls...... "The age my Nan was when she broke her hymen...87!" .... "Do me up the bum until I am bloody and sore...54!".
In fact no need to picture, here is what it is like......
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| The bingo callers with the potty mouths! |
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| Who loves fucking numbers?!? |
The prizes are silly, a stuffed panda (which my mate actually won yesterday!), novelty umbrella, glitter ball. It is fun, it is silly and definitely not for the easily offended! The only downside is some of the twats that having the event being held in Hoxton brings.....Hipster, pretentious C*NTS! Clearly some of them were having their first beer or so it seemed. You see the thing about rebel bingo is you mix a room full of drunkereds with felt tip pens....
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| case in point! |
This inevitably breeds TWATS! We had a group of these TWATS right next to us, who were all fighting each other with pens on who could write the most hilarious thing... because writing 'c*unt' and drawing a dick is so original...what rebels!! Just going off topic a second, isn't it funny no matter where you come from in the world or your age group everyone always draws the same cartoon penis
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| big fat balls and a short fat shaft! #classic |
1."Oops! You bumped into me so that's why you are covered in beer...SOR-RY, I am not sorry!"
2."Oops! You bumped into me again and my lid was off my bingo pen, so now your top is covered in red felt tip pen....SOR-RY, I am not sorry!
Never mess with the Pulse sisters!.. Us girls (Me, my sister Kell-belle, Rizzle, Smithy and Baker) left Rebel Bingo feeling rejuvenated, holding our new prize friend the panda like Jess Ennis held her gold medal.. aloft in the air, full or pride that 'WE DID IT!'
Anyway this is what the doctor ordered, a night of silliness and I am not so hungover I can't go to the gym... Beer before liquor never been sicker, liquor before beer you're in the clear!!
Power Song: Pink - Raise Your Glass
Miss Pulse
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